What Do You Do When the Doctor Calls with Bad News?

So I received a phone call from my doctor today. Turns out that while things looked good on the outside  that's not the case internally. It looks like I have precancerous cells trying to form in my reproductive area again, and I have a follow up appointment scheduled in a couple of weeks. I was going through the same thing this time 2 years ago which resulted in an outpatient surgery, pain, and emotional distress. That's why I called Tre' my little miracle baby. I've been told that I would not be able to conceive without infertility medication before. Theoretically he was conceived a week before my surgery with little to no effort.  I didn't know I was pregnant until I was going on my 14th week.  So here we go again with the cancer scare that could potentially keep me from ever having children. Since I was 21 I have been diagnosed with poly-cystic ovarian syndrome, a number of cysts, fibroids, scarred tissues, HPV ( the strain that causes cervical cancer not warts), cancer lesions, have had 2 miscarriages, and on top of all that I lost my only son while fasting, praying, tithing, seeking God's face, serving, being health conscious, and giving. I am by no means perfect or a saint, but my point is that even though we try to live right, that does not exempt us from the pains of living in this world all the time. Reading all of this people will probably get a glimpse of my pain and frustration when it comes to loss and reproduction. So here we go again. What do you do when the doctor calls with bad news?  It's so easy to say trust God, pray, stand on His Word, etc. When you have been through what I have been through, sometimes you just get plain tired. When does the struggle and pain end? Sometimes we feel like what is the point to life and living? Well the point to life is glorifying God, and when we have done all that we can do, we still have to stand on His promises and trust Him like Job. We still have to pray, and we still have to praise regardless of what the situation looks like. For me it no longer matters what I feel like, what's happening around me or what's happening to me. Trusting, obeying, and looking to God is not an option. I made up my mind that I shall not be moved in any direction, but forward. Did I sit down and cry? Absolutely. Did a rush of emotions overwhelm me? Definitely. Sometimes I don't understand why me Lord, but right now I refuse to get caught up on that. Forward marching only this season. I shall not be moved from my course. I understand what the doctor said, but I also know what God says in His word and that's what I try to focus on. He has healed and restored me many times in the past, and His record is perfect. I write this to encourage myself, remembering what He's done for me and so that others will know that the same grace, mercy, and healing He extends to me is available to them too. Regardless of what happens, God is in control.